20...

Wow I'm 20, yea I know my birthday was about a week ago but I still wanna reflect about this stuff.

20 years old means that I'm no longer a teenager I really don't feel that old until I look at my kid brother who is 8 years younger than me. The fact that this year my kid brother will be 12 makes me feel old because I remember when I was 12 that I was thinking one more year and I'll finally be a teenager. Now that I'm leaving the teen range and moving on to the 20's and eventually the 30's makes me feel a little old.

I remembered when I was 17 the only thing I was excited about was that I could go buy lottery tickets, and since I don't smoke I wasn't excited that I was able to buy cigarettes. Since I've turned 20 its only one more year before I can legally drink. Then I can go out with my friends to a bar and then get an appletini. Oh well until then I guess I'll have to get used to the idea that I'm no longer a teenager and moving onward towards adulthood.

Edit: when I say go out and drink I mean probably once or something since I'm not too sure if I'll like drinking.

Life...

Another angsty post about life so if you're in a cheery mood I suggest not reading this fully. Life is a very interesting thing, it seems to have some sort of balance in it well my life anyways. Since for some reason there are periods of the good/happy/cheerful events and then there are the periods of struggle/depressing/sad/extremely stressful events that somehow balance out the "good" events. For me from past experience I feel that when I experience those "bad" events it takes a great toll on my body, for example I might feel exhausted easier, feel sleepy almost all the time, and my eyes tend to hurt more.

Another weird thing that I found is that Life seems to lump all those events together so that its not one bad event its a bunch usually occurring all at the same time. Sometimes when I go through those hard times I reflect back to how I should take into account the good events more, since we barely notice good events unless they are big and extravagent. Some good events that usually go overlooked are: hanging out with friends, having a loving family, or having the things that we are given (I know that this might not make too much sense).

When the bad events come people usually feel overwhelmed because they all cause stress on our body's and sometimes it feels like too much at times. Although Life does not really care when the bad events come or what else is going on in our lives. Anyways sorry to the people who had to read such a depressing post. I know that it doesn't make much sense but I have a midterm on Wednesday and I just wanted to get this down before I forgot.