Random Thoughts of an exhausted soul...

Been a while since I've posted and I guess since being totally exhausted I get a sort of stream of consciousness going from my thoughts so what better time to blog and reflect. Anyways I don't really know who reads my blog, haha I know if you read this and you're my friend post something. Comments by anyone whom I don't know I will probably delete since most of them are useless, but I'll welcome comments from my friends.

Dang my stream of consciousness is already taking effect. Guess about 4 or 3.5 hours of sleep along with 4 hours of class plus about 6.5 or 7 hours of my rotation. Combine that with caffeine from tea and a milk tea and whoo you got a Marcus whose mentally exhausted but a body that wants to keep on moving. Looks like I won't be sleeping early tonight, bummer. So far I like what I'm doing with my stream of consciousness, but I know I'll read this and probably some of my friends and will be like "what the heck is wrong with Marcus." It's I miss SoCal and all my awesome friends and family. I miss the fun times I get to hang out with my friends. I know I'm supposed to be making new friends here but knowing my personality it always takes me a long time to find people who I can truly consider my friends. Since with my whole housing fiasco the beginning of the school year showed me how close and how much my roommates cared. Felt a little cynical about that but I know one thing for sure is that I got awesome friends back at home. To my awesome friends and family thanks for being there for me!

Now then that was a great tangent off of what I actually felt like discussing. I guess something about human nature. How it seems that people when faced with hard times will always quit and find the easy way out. Never trying to put the effort in to try to make something work. Must be because people always look out for themselves. For those who try to help others and be a good person I salute you and congratulate you for keeping up with it. Since I always wonder why do people give up easily and let everything fall apart instead of trying to hold it together and using hard work to make it through the tough time. Why do people tend to cheat on tests and try to find ways to get out of lots of work, why are there people who cheat on their spouses or significant other, why aren't people willing to work hard to create something that can be beautiful.

I guess I feel that no matter what I do I'll try to work my hardest with my determination in anything I do. If you know Naruto and I feel I am most like Rock Lee since he's the hardest working ninja. I'm not really good in anything but I'll work hard and use that effort to show everyone that I can be just as good as anyone else.

Also too in relationships there is a lot of work put into it to make it work. Something from Scrubs where Turk says "Marriage should be like that" in the context he was referring to how easy something was and how marriage should be like that. Although to counter that the same episode Bob Kelso says "nothing in this world that's worth having comes easy." Although continually we see in our society how people cheat on their spouses or significant others because they aren't satisfied with them any more. Movies and television shows are prime examples because they are full of it. Even more so people are willing to give up on relationships just because its gets too hard to keep it going. Those who give up, it makes it harder on the ones who didn't really want it to end and wanted to make it work by working through it. The movies and shows don't really show the aftermath of the person who was abandoned. They make it sugarcoated and in reality when someone gives up in a relationship the one who is left with nothing feels abandoned and is left in a bad place.

In truth it saddens me to see the characteristic where people just give up without any effort. Since I feel if you have that then in anything you'll give up when things get too difficult and one would only go do things at their convenience. Which is sad because nothing in life is easy and if you give up without trying then you won't really find what you're looking for or reach your goal. A cliche saying is "shoot for the moon so that even if you miss you'll land on the stars." The saying is work your hardest for your goal and if don't accomplish it exactly as you wanted it you'll still have something great since you worked hard and didn't give up.

Dang I don't really even know if this will make any sense to any of my readers since I'm just writing almost exactly what pops into my head and putting it on my blog. I feel I get my most interesting reflections when I do this. Anyways if I offended you by what I wrote I apologize since this is a reflection and something that came forth from my exhausted state of mind with a still active body. On a random note I wish I could be home for Chinese New Years. Oh well cheers everyone, take care and be safe.