Late night Thoughts and Reflections

I think its been about 3 or 4 days now that I've been by myself in the apartment. It feels odd not having my roommate in the apartment. I suppose the way its been the past couple of days is like if I were to live by myself in a single apartment. There are pros and cons to being by oneself in living situations.

Pros so far I've seen is that I can play my music without worrying about it bothering my roommate. I don't have to worry about making noise when its late and my roommate is asleep, right now I'm playing music and I think it would be a bother to my roommate if he were here now. I can do my work out regime without feeling weird when my roommate comes out and sees me working out, I usually do my workouts late at night to avoid him seeing me. I can watch shows in the kitchen while I cook or eat dinner. I also feel that there is more freedoms I have since I'm by myself.

Cons are that I'm by myself and there's no one to talk to about stuff. This means that its me and my thoughts, which is not such a good thing. Since I over think a lot of things and make a big deal over things that are probably little things. There is no human interaction, unless its when I go out and interact with people. Which over the past few days has been for training for my job, and grocery shopping.

The fact that I'm with my thoughts for the most part of the past few days has made me think about a lot of things. My heart and mind arguments I have I've been thinking about a lot. I know that its my fault that I don't have friends like I do back at home where I can call up and say lets hang out. Since if I feel that if I were to try that up here people would find it weird and such. Also I've noticed my insomnia has gotten worse due to school. Now I stay up until 5am and sleep. Right now its about 2:45 and I should brush up and sleep soon, but I find it appalling at how I'm able to find random stuff to do online or other stuff that keeps me awake until that long. Last night I went to bed around 5am and I actually couldn't sleep until about 5:45am or so since I was tossing and turning. The weird thing is that I was sleepy. I suppose its the thoughts I have that keep me awake. When I sleep I try not to think about anything and let myself drift off to sleep. Last night from what I remember I was thinking about a lot of stuff and I think that may have carried over into my dream, since I had a vivid dream and I think it was due to my thoughts I was having before I slept. The dream was not a good one if you're wondering. I have heard that to distract oneself from thinking too much about stuff is to find things to do to busy yourself. So far its kinda been difficult since there isn't school to take up the bulk of the time. What I have been doing is watching shows online and doing my exercise regime. Today I managed to lift weights and do some push ups. Later on in the day I did my pushup and crunches regime. So I was kinda amazed that I was able to do two exercise regimes in a day. This showed me just how much time I do have now that school is out.

I really don't know why I over-think things and run multiple scenarios in my head. By doing that one would think that I'm good at chess or other strategy games. The truth is I'm not that good. I think it may be because I make my choices more so complicated than they have to be and that ends up confusing me and making me a little afraid to make a choice out of my possible scenarios.

Ugh...I need to fix my sleep schedule so I can sleep earlier. I also need to stop overthinking over things. It has been kinda taxing on me and I feel a little run down because of it. Well anyways its almost 3am I'm going to try sleep soon. Night.